Suck A D*@k. Save A Marriage.
Q & A by Krystal Luster
Where are you from? Give us a little background on your upbringing.
I was born and raised in California, Los Angeles area. I spent high school and college in North Carolina after my parents moved us across the country, so I was exposed to a lot. I have a very diverse background and upbringing, which I am very thankful for.
Did your blog ‘Cutie Run’ spark your interest to write a book or books?
No, http://www.cutierun.blogspot.com came after my initial book writings. My first book, in domestic violence was released in 2007. Cutie Run will later become books; two, one for teens and one for adults, both focusing on healthy relationships, how to identify them and what to avoid.
Are the contents in ‘Suck a D*@k Save a Marriage’, as straight-forward as its title?
The title speaks to putting something positive in your mouth, like praise and encouragement, and perhaps a little…. Which, incidentally, is the most positive thing, from a man’s point of view, that a woman can put in her mouth.
This book is very foundational to help people understand healthier relationships, and within that, healthier sex lives. There is an e-book, Sex: The Addendum, that I am in the process of writing that will layout all, and more about sex. Though, this book does have a chapter, 10, about sex, the ebook will give a more in-depth look on it.
What sets your book on a different scale from other self-help books?
I am NOT a licensed anything, I don’t want to be. I have been life coaching people for the past six years, to live healthier, happier lives. I speak from personal experiences/testimonies, and those shared with me from close friends, and family. People need to hear that others have gone through similar situations, they aren’t alone, and they too can overcome and live the best life possible, in spite of. The truth is, everyone has gone through something. Unfortunately, some things aren’t the best situations, but at the end of the day, you have a decision to make… either continue living in victim mentality, or move forward, forgive, and use the negative to make you stronger!
Were you ever skeptical to publish literature on a common controversial topic? Why?
I actually changed the title for several months. I talk about it in the forward of my book. Changed it to fit in, satisfy my parents…but at the end of the going back and forth about the title, I had to stay true to what I believe the title NEEDED to be. It’s to reach who it is supposed to reach, to those it needs to reach. So, though I went back and forth, I never thought it was about my discomfort, but to appease others.
The topic never gave me pause. It is a personal testimony, that I am not ashamed of.
Do you believe blunt honest is more beneficial than “sugar-coating” the truth?
Honesty is always essential. I talk in my book about healthy communication. That entails honesty. Though in being honest, there is a thing called tact and diplomacy. That’s where people get confused, that’s where I was confused. I thought honesty meant you can say what ever, how ever, with no regard. Where, in fact, honey on the lips goes further than vinegar on the tongue. So, how you say things is a huge part in healthy communication.
What kind of feedback do you usually receive, whether you’re speaking at an event, having a book signing or just socializing in everyday life? Has much changed since before reaching your “celebrity”?
The feedback I receive is incredibly supportive. There is about 1% of the population that can’t get past the title, but that was expected. Again, it’s who it’s for, and I know if and when they hear me speak, their opinions will be changed. The book is solid, and if you can’t see past the title, you are definitely missing out! People love the title, and they love the message. They [the title and message] are different, but not. I love the feedback I get, because I know I am positively effecting the lives of people. I am helping people have healthier relationships, and healthier sex lives.
It’s weird to be out and people notice me, and call me by name. I’m used to being the center of attention with friends, and at events, but it’s different than total strangers knowing you and thanking you. I am very humbled and grateful…taking over as THE New Healthy Relationship and Sex Advisor!
Do you mind telling us what your breaking point was to leave your first marriage?
Actually, my personality is to work through things. It was my ex who finally made the call of divorce. I actually felt like we could have worked through the situation if he would just change…the lesson I learned and am now passing on to others. You can only change yourself is what I am continually telling others. A hard lesson learned. I loved him, and had hope of being with him for ever, part of what makes a woman, abused or not, stay longer than the expiration date of the relationship.
Name two things you wouldn’t be able to do presently had you remained in your marriage.
- Cutie Run – which is my blog, because it talks about my dating life, I obviously wouldn’t be dating while being married.
- Consider moving about the way I have and desire to continue doing so. He was a totally different personality and fixed in North Carolina, while my every fiber needed to be back in a big city.
Has having a relationship with God always been a top priority in life? Why?
Yes and No. I didn’t have the same understanding of God as I do now. It’s apart of my very being. So, though I was brought up in the Church, I didn’t have a relationship with God, or an understanding of He, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit and their relationship with me. Now, I understand my relationship with God is not determined nor defined by other people. I love the Lord with all my heart.
Do you think the tips provided in ‘Suck a D*@k Save a Marriage’ would be as beneficial for someone who doesn’t have God in their life?
Absolutely, I wrote the book from my experiences, and where I am in life. That includes God for me, but for someone who doesn’t go to Church nor have a relationship with God, the book is just solid foundational information that will help their relationships become healthier. I wrote this book for EVERYONE! Gay, Straight, men, women, everyone. Actually, I have said many times before, I didn’t write this book for the zealot…for the Christian who can’t see past the title…
Aside from your writings, you also market your own products. Tell us what they are.
I have a bunch of products for this book, and future books. I am always thinking, so, I am prepared for the long haul of the Marlo Wright Movement…Healthy Relationship and Sex Lives. There’s the T-Shirt, for the bold and daring woman and Marlo Wright’s Raspberry Drizzle, is a blush, all natural, no sugar added, wine…that actually tastes like something (raspberries). The first of several wines that will be released. I have several other products, but will wait until I am closer to releasing them to talk about them.
What are you working on now and when can we expect it?
I am currently working on another book tour. At the end of ’10, I went to Atlanta, New Jersey, and Philly. I recently returned from New York, Harlem showed as much love as the other cities. Hoping to return there very soon. Hoping to have this tour rolling by late summer ’11
Also working on Sex: The Addendum. In SaD SaM, Chapter 10 Sex, I come from a foundation point of view. This e-book, will go into more detail of sex, and give people what they thought they would get from this book… tips, in detail about sex. Looking for a release date of August for this e-book.
Is there a potential boyfriend in your life now or are you still on the dating scene?
No, unfortunately not. Dating is challenging. Before the release of the book, I found it challenging, but now, there’s the factor of the book that attracts a different type of person. Those who are curious about the title, and those who feel like they are next in line just because of the title.
I’m leary about men because, of some of the experiences I have had. One guy was around just because of the potential success of the book, and lied about his marital status…he was still married. Another guy I dated off and on for three years who ended up being married as well, according to word on the street. Something I couldn’t risk the streets getting wind of and then accusing me of sucking his d*@k to save his marriage. Also something I was very hurt over, since I asked him if he was as well. It’s a shame that i have to pull background checks on people I am interested in these days.
I would like a monogamous relationship with a man with no kids preferably, but that wants kids someday. Someone who doesn’t feel threatened by the success of the book, cause there is more to come, this is just the beginning. Someone who is there for me, not for the me they think they know from the interviews, videos, or even my book. Until then, I continue to date, and blog about it.
Are you comfortable/happy with being single?
I AM HAPPY! I am happy in life, and that includes being single. I found my happy. What I mean by that is I have decidedly moved into my happy, not taking on the negativity from others, and their perceptions or expectations of me. Nor waiting till I “arrived” at any particular point in life. ie. once I remarry, once I have more money, or once I’ve made a successful career. The truth is, if you base your happiness off things, you will never be happy. I decided to be positive and think positively instead of dwelling in the land of “negative nancy’s” and “debbie downers.” Not only are they unattractive, but they attract the same…negative attracts negative. I crave positive and happy people.
What are you most proud of in your life right now?
I am most proud of my accomplishments. I have done so much in my 34 years of life, and continue to have great ideas that I execute. I have successfully written my third book, published it, and marketed it in multiple states. I am a business woman, and a pretty good one to have had several successful companies prior to this. I owned and operated a landscaping company, an interior design business, business development and consulting, and coaching through my nonprofit organization. I am very humbled, and very fortunate.
Are there any authors who have inspired your work? Who are they?
I like to write with clarity. Therefore, authors who have similar writing style, and better is great for me. I read a lot of Napoleon Hill, John Bevere and a lot of books by authors lesser heard of.
Share one of your favorite past times/ hobby.
Believe it or not, I love to read. I find reading others material helps refine my writing, and gives me new ways to consider and incorporate in my writing. I love golfing, movies, and baseball games.
Have you always been an open individual with others?
ALWAYS. I am known to go against the grain, and to be honestly open with people. I just find that it’s easier, though I am learning to be more selective to whom I tell what.
Is there a quote that you live by? What is it?
Could be good, could be bad, who knows.
How can you be contacted for booking purposes?
They can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or call 646-470-5727